Cincinnati Airport's BEST Kept Secret: Red Roof Inn Review!
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into the, uh, slightly hidden world of the Red Roof Inn at Cincinnati Airport! Believe me, I've seen a lot of airport hotels, and this one… well, it's got a certain… charm. Let's just say it’s not the Ritz, but for the price, and the sheer proximity to the airport (oh, glorious proximity!), it might just salvage a layover from despair.
First Impressions: The "We're Here" Vibe (and the Parking, Oh the Parking!)
Let's be real, the exterior isn't going to win any architectural awards. Think… functional. Think… "I'm here because I need a bed, not because I want to Instagram a sunset." But hey, the sign is big and you find it easy enough.
Accessibility: Alright, important stuff first. The entrance wasn't perfectly flat – a tiny little ramp, but generally, seemed easy to navigate. I didn't test all the super-detailed metrics, but it looked mostly accessible, with elevators (essential!), and I'm guessing they've got rooms set up. (I didn't ask, but honestly, most hotels at least offer some accessibility these days.)
Getting Around: The free parking is a HUGE win. Seriously, airport parking costs more than my sanity. (And trust me, that ain't cheap.) Easy to find, plenty of room. Bonus points for that. Don't get your hopes up about a fancy valet – you are on your own, my friend.
The Room: A Sanctuary of… Practicality
Okay, here's where things get real. My room wasn't fancy, let's just leave it at that. But, surprisingly, it was clean. Seriously, that's the most important thing, right?
Cleanliness and Safety: I’m not a germaphobe, but I do appreciate a clean room. The bed was made, no rogue hairs clinging to the pillows, and the bathroom… well, it looked sanitary. HUGE win in the post-pandemic world, right?
Available in All Rooms: Okay, the basics. Air conditioning? Check. Alarm clock? Check. Hair dryer? Check. Free Wi-Fi? DOUBLE CHECK! Listen, free Wi-Fi is a lifesaver. And it actually worked, which is a miracle in itself. I could binge-watch my guilty pleasure shows without buffering. Glory!
Internet Access: This is where it truly shines. Not only is there Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!, but there’s also Internet access – LAN. So you get whatever type of internet you need.
Room Details:
- Additional toilet: Nope. Standard room, folks.
- Air conditioning: Essential.
- Alarm clock: Yup.
- Bathrobes: Nope.
- Bathroom phone: Seriously?
- Bathtub: Yep.
- Blackout curtains: THANK YOU, RED ROOF INN! I sleep in the dark.
- Carpeting: Yes, and it looked cleanish!
- Closet: Yep.
- Coffee/tea maker: Yes! A mini-version.
- Complimentary tea: Yup.
- Daily housekeeping: Yes.
- Desk: A small one, but functional.
- Extra long bed: I didn't measure. Normal double.
- Free bottled water: Nope. But a mini-fridge to put your own in.
- Hair dryer: Yup.
- High floor: Not necessarily.
- In-room safe box: Nope.
- Interconnecting room(s) available: Didn’t ask.
- Internet access – LAN: Yes!
- Internet access – wireless: Yes!
- Ironing facilities: A small iron.
- Laptop workspace: Desk does the trick, and Wi-fi works great.
- Linens: Clean sheets.
- Mini bar: No, but there's a small refrigerator.
- Mirror: Standard.
- Non-smoking: Yes!
- On-demand movies: Not that I could see.
- Private bathroom: Of course!
- Reading light: Yep.
- Refrigerator: A small one!
- Safety/security feature: Smoke detector, etc.
- Satellite/cable channels: Okay selection.
- Scale: Nope, thank goodness.
- Seating area: Nope.
- Separate shower/bathtub: Combined.
- Shower: Yup.
- Slippers: Nope.
- Smoke detector: Yes.
- Socket near the bed: Important!
- Sofa: Nope.
- Soundproofing: It worked. I slept.
- Telephone: Basic landline.
- Toiletries: Basic soap and shampoo. Bring your own fancy stuff.
- Towels: Clean!
- Umbrella: Nope.
- Visual alarm: Not sure.
- Wake-up service: They offer it.
- Wi-Fi [free]: Yes!
- Window that opens: A little, for fresh air.
Amenities: Minimalist, But Functional (Mostly)
This isn't a resort, people. Manage your expectations.
- Fitness center: This is the classic "technically a gym, but…" situation. I didn't go. I walked the airport terminal instead. The description does say there is one!
- Breakfast: Okay, this is a big maybe. It's the classic continental breakfast. A small selection of muffins, bagels, cereal, and coffee. (Don’t expect gourmet, but it'll do in a pinch.) I didn't have it, but I saw the "grab and go" boxes.
- Dining, drinking, and snacking: There's no fancy restaurant. No. Just the coffee and grab-and-go breakfast I mentioned.
- Services and Conveniences:
- Air conditioning in public area: Yes!
- Business facilities: Standard stuff.
- Cash withdrawal: Likely at a nearby ATM (I didn’t check).
- Concierge: Nope.
- Contactless check-in/out: They probably have this, these days.
- Convenience store: Nope.
- Currency exchange: Nope.
- Daily housekeeping: Yes!
- Doorman: Nope.
- Dry cleaning: Nope.
- Elevator: Yep.
- Essential condiments:: The basics.
- Facilities for disabled guests: Probably.
- Food delivery: No.
- Gift/souvenir shop: Nope.
- Indoor venue for special events: Nope.
- Invoice provided: Probably.
- Ironing service: Yup, or you can do it yourself.
- Laundry service: Nope.
- Luggage storage: Probably not.
- Meeting/banquet facilities: Nope, other than in the rooms.
- Meetings: See above.
- Meeting stationery: Prob not.
- On-site event hosting: Nope.
- Outdoor venue for special events: Nope.
- Projector/LED display: Unlikely.
- Safety deposit boxes: Nope.
- Seminars: Nope.
- Shrine: Nope.
- Smoking area: Yes.
- Terrace: Nope.
- Wi-Fi for special events: Yes!
- Xerox/fax in business center: Yep.
Staff: Friendly, Helpful (Mostly)
The front desk staff were, for the most part, pleasant. Quick check-in, quick check-out. No complaints.
The "Secret" Revealed – and Why You Might Actually Like This Place:
Okay, here's the deal: This hotel is the BEST KEPT SECRET for a reason. It’s not the fanciest, but sometimes you just need a clean bed, a hot shower, and to be close to the airport. And for that, the Red Roof Inn delivers.
Here's the hard sell (but a real one):
Are you a…
- Frequent Flyer? You need a place close to the airport, with free parking, and free Wi-Fi. Boom. Done.
- Budget Traveler? This is your jam. It’s cheap, and you’re not paying for fluff.
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because this ain't your grandma's polished travel brochure. This is the real deal, a messy, glorious, probably-slightly-hungover itinerary for a stay at the Red Roof Inn Cincinnati Airport – Florence/Erlanger. Prepare for a wild ride.
Day 1: Arrival, Existential Dread, and the Glorious Reality of a Red Roof Inn
- 14:00 (Give or take an hour – let's be real, I'm always late): Arrive at the Cincinnati Airport. Honestly, airports…they're a necessary evil. This one seemed to be populated primarily by families with screaming children and business travelers who look like they haven't slept since the Reagan administration. Pick up the rental car. Pray it doesn't smell like stale french fries (a recurring theme in my life, apparently).
- 15:00 - 15:30: The drive to the Red Roof Inn. Google Maps promised a scenic route. Google Maps lied. It was the standard suburban sprawl of chain restaurants and strip malls. My soul wept a little.
- 15:30 - 16:00: Check-in. Ah, Red Roof Inn. It’s a comfort, you know? Like that old, slightly threadbare t-shirt you keep around for bad days. The woman at the desk was lovely, bless her heart, dealing with the endless parade of sleep-deprived travelers. The room? Surprisingly clean. Score! The bed… well, it’ll do.
- 16:00 - 17:00: Deep breaths. Unpack. Survey the landscape of the room. Realize I've forgotten my phone charger (of course). Mild panic sets in. Consider abandoning the entire trip and becoming a hermit. Decide against it (probably).
- 17:00 - 19:00: The eternal battle of What To Eat. The options around here are… well, let's just say they are plentiful. Ended up at a place called "Applebee's" - for ambiance, it's what you'd expect. The food was as expected, a mid-range meal that did nothing to excite or appall.
- 19:00 - 21:00: Relax and unwind? Ha! More like the endless hunt for a good channel. Finally settled on a History channel doc about ancient Mesopotamian civilizations. My brain's too tired for anything too thought-provoking. Drift off to sleep.
Day 2: Kentucky! Bourbon, Babies and a Whole Lotta Drive Times
- 08:00: Wake up. Breakfast? No, too lazy. Grabbing a banana I didn’t eat the last day.
- 09:00 - 10:00: Drive to Newport, Kentucky. The city's got some charming old architecture, some not-so-charming contemporary buildings, and a general feeling of being at the intersection of "trying" and "doing ok".
- 10:00 - 12:00: The Newport river front. This is where the "trying" becomes a bit more evident. Many restaurants and bars.
- 12:00 - 13:00: Lunch at a random deli. The sandwich was decent, but the real highlight was the elderly couple at the next table, whose bickering was a masterclass in passive-aggressive communication. Pure entertainment.
- 13:00 - 15:00: The drive to a bourbon distillery! (I heard a lot of good things about the area.) I was SO ready for this. The countryside was beautiful, rolling hills and vast fields. As I arrived, I realized I needed to make a reservation. And I didn't. Dammit all. I got stuck with the "self-guided tour." Turns out, wandering around a distillery by yourself is a lot like wandering around a library – you can look, but touching anything will get you in trouble.
- 15:00 - 16:00: More driving! Now I'm on my way to a place I heard about, the Ark Encounter. I arrived and stood in awe of the sheer scale. But the experience itself…it's a whole other story. There were some pretty serious things missing. To be honest, I came out feeling confused.
- 16:00 - 18:00: I needed a palate cleanser. Found a local ice cream shop that was delightful. The staff's kindness was a salve after the Ark.
- 18:00 - 20:00: Drive back to the Red Roof Inn. Eat a sad microwave dinner.
- 20:00 - 00:00: Collapse on the bed. Consider ordering another pizza. But the shame settles and I go to sleep.
Day 3: Airport-Bound, with a Dash of Regret
- 08:00: "Wake up." More like, "Stumble out of bed, disoriented and questioning all life choices."
- 09:00 - 10:00: Check out. Said goodbye to the sweet desk clerk. Hope she gets a raise.
- 10:00 - 11:00: Final drive back to the airport. Return the rental car. Wonder how many speeding tickets I racked up.
- 11:00 - 12:00: Airport security. The usual chaotic dance of removing shoes, emptying pockets, and praying the TSA agent doesn't single me out. Survived.
- 12:00 - 14:00: Wait for the flight. Reflect on the trip. Mostly, am I glad that I went? Yes. Was it glamorous? Absolutely not. Did I learn anything? Probably not. Amuse the time reading travel guides and the other people.
- 14:00: Board the plane. Adios, Cincinnati. Until next time, you quirky, sometimes-charming, often-confounding destination of mine.
This, my friends, is the unfiltered truth of a solo trip. It's messy, it's imperfect, and sometimes, it's just a little bit… mediocre. But that's okay. Because even the mediocre moments make a story. And isn't that what life is all about? Now if you'll excuse me, I need a nap.
Dalyan Rota Hotel: Your Unforgettable Turkish Escape Awaits!
Cincinnati Airport's "Best Kept Secret"...or is it? A Red Roof Inn Review (Maybe?)
Okay, let's be real. Is this Red Roof Inn *really* a secret at CVG? I mean, it *is* right there...
Alright, alright, the "secret" thing is a *bit* of a stretch. It's not like they've buried it beneath the airport tarmac. But hear me out: I've stayed at places closer to the airport and still felt like I had to drive to Narnia to get there. This Red Roof? BAM. Literally steps from the terminal (well, maybe a short shuttle ride, but close enough that the existential dread of missing your flight is significantly lessened). So, "secret" in the sense that it's maybe underrated? Possibly. I've seen people *miss* the shuttle, the poor souls. I almost did once. Nightmare fuel, that is.
The rooms... what's the vibe? Cozy? Spartan? Like a questionable time capsule?
Okay, "cozy" might be pushing it. "Functional" is probably a better descriptor. Think... budget motel, but with a vaguely aviation-themed wallpaper. The beds? Let's say they're... serviceable. I slept. I didn't wake up with a crick in my neck screaming for a chiropractor. That's a win in my book! The bathroom? Clean-ish. Look, you're not getting the Ritz. You're here to catch a flight, not write a magnum opus about luxury hotel amenities. The biggest thing, *honestly* is the noise. Sometimes, and *sometimes* can be an understatement, the *planes*. I swear, you can hear them changing gears just before takeoff. And the air conditioning unit? More than once was a real test. BUT, the price you pay for a hotel near the airport is a lot less with Red Roof Inn!
Shuttle service - smooth sailing or the eighth circle of airport hell?
Generally, the shuttle is pretty decent. It's part of the bargain, you know? It's free, which is AMAZING in this world of hotel fees. Now, here's the thing... timing can be a *nightmare*. Once, I landed at CVG after a brutal red-eye. I was a zombie, fueled by stale airport coffee and the desperate hope of a shower. The shuttle? Nowhere to be seen. Waited... and waited... and finally called the front desk. Turns out the driver had, shall we say, "taken an unexpected detour." Eventually, got there. But that 4+ minutes wait felt like 4+ hours. So, have patience. And maybe, just maybe, pack a snack. Or two.
Breakfast. Do they even bother? And if so... what horrors await?
See, this is where Red Roof (usually, in my experience) shows its true colors. "Breakfast included," yes. But... don't expect a gourmet spread. Think pre-packaged pastries, maybe some instant oatmeal, and coffee that's probably been brewing since the dawn of time. I remember one morning, I swear the "fruit" selection consisted of a banana so black it looked like a petrified banana from the Cretaceous period. I did NOT risk it. Honestly, I usually grab something quick at the airport before heading over. Better safe than sorry. And there are almost *always* waffles!
Price. The burning question. Worth it? Or should I just sleep in the airport?
Okay, now we're talking. The *price* is the killer app. It's usually a fraction of what you'd pay at the fancier airport hotels. That's the main draw. Look, if you're on a budget and need a place to crash for a few hours between flights, or you have an early morning and desperately want to avoid the Cincinnati traffic... this is a winner. You're sacrificing a little luxury to get a *lot* of convenience and a less-painful dent in your wallet. Would I recommend it if I was celebrating a special occasion? Absolutely not. But for a quick overnight? Absolutely. And sometimes... sometimes those cheap, slightly-battered hotel rooms are what you *need* after a long day. Even if the wallpaper is... memorable.
Biggest Pro? And the biggest Con?
Pro: Location, location, location! Seriously. It's like a magical portal whisking you from the airport to your bed in minutes. Con: The sometimes-unpredictable noise levels. I swear, the planes land *directly* on top of the hotel at times and the shuttle situation, it's always an adventure. Prepare for the possibility to wait. BUT if you factor in the price and the time you'll be saving and the, well everything... Honestly, it's a trade-off. Choose your battles. And maybe pack some earplugs.
Any particularly *memorable* experiences? Good or bad? Spill the tea!
Oh, *absolutely*. Let me tell you about the Great Air Conditioning Purge of '22. It was July. Sweltering. And, our AC unit in the room decided it was going on strike. Wouldn't work. At. All. Now, I'm not one to complain... but the humidity was *brutal*. So, I went to the front desk, which took a good ten minutes (because, let's be honest, I wasn't the only one). They were super nice, got us another room immediately. But the memory? Ugh. Sweating, sticky, and praying for a miracle. In the end? It just added to my life experience!
